My ammi used to tell me fairy tales which I believed and thought when I will grow up, I too will be a part of them. Those fine bright days do not really exist today. No more fairy tales, I do not even remember the last time I lay in my ammi's lap.
Time and again I went through my childhood lane and realised how ironical life is now. I spent hours playing on the streets, where now I walk alone. Friend circle has cut down to a handkerchief which use to be a full length saree. Emotions were limited to happy- when dad got me a new doll, sad- when I fought with my best friend, anger- when I did not get my favourite ice cream and fear- when ammi left my hand. Today I cannot even figure out how my mood is going to be in the next hour.
I loved that easy life. I do not hate the complex one but at times, it is hard to cope with it. It is hard to forget the bad, it is hard to hold back those tears. I miss the family time, dinners which are limited to Sundays. I miss my ammi's caress when she used to make me sleep. I miss playing for hours without the tension of completing assignments. I miss it all. But like it is said, you grow up with time (you need to) and learn to walk with it.
This year has been not less than a roller coaster ride. So this new year I plan to spend family time, balance and sort my life.
Start with a new beginning, a fresh start, some beautiful hopes, aim high, fulfill at least one wish, find that one person in your life who you know will stay with you no matter what, smile and spread it.
So what's your new year resolution ? :)
